In Everything Give Thanks (Part 2)

“In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God…”

Giving thanks is not just accepting situation blindly. In fact it is a wise decision that we need to make in order to continually living in His will. We were talking about giving thanks as a will of God and when we give thanks, we will be able to acknowledge God’s faithfulness and embrace his promises in our lives. (Part 1)

Here, I would like to direct you to the heart of “giving thanks.” It starts with a paradox: If we give thanks then we will not COMPLAIN. This is because we cannot give thanks and complain at the same time.

Consider the Israelites: when they were under oppression, they cried out to God. When God brought them out of Egypt, they complained and murmured against Moses and God. When they were cornered in front of the Red Sea with the Egyptian army behind them, they murmured and complaint to Moses. Moses, a young leader cried out to God and he was instructed to touch the Red Sea and it parted. That was the greatest miracle ever happened in human history. They were walking right into a live aquarium on dry land, right in the middle of the Red Sea. But before long, they forgot all about the miracles and the powerful God. Even when God provided “manna” and water, clouds in the morning and pillars of fire at night, they still complaints. They were called “the stiff-necked” people.

Well, we all know the price they have to pay for their faithless attitude: the entire generation died in the wilderness except Joshua and Caleb before they entered the Promised-land.

Complaining and unappreciative attitude are very costly. It could cost us our happiness, our relationship with the others and most of all our relationship with God. When we complain, we forgot to consider faith in Him. It robs us of the joy and peace. Instead of rejoicing, we are bound with revenge and pride. “Pride goes before destruction” Prov 16:18; yet how many of us are seeing pride and revenge go hand in hand. We are not happy with how the other person has taken advantage of the situation, so we revenge. We revenge because we cannot accept to be the underdog.

Instead, giving thanks will release us of such pressures to revenge. I have new visitors to church from another church. I always have the courtesy to ask where they are from and possibly ask why they wanted to attend our church. If they are here because they have shifted to our area, they are most welcomed. But they are some who came because they have problems with the previous church’s pastors/members. Well, I have no problem with that because not all people could get along with everyone, right?

But I will get pretty agitated if they start to ramp on the previous church’s weaknesses especially on the leadership of the church. Frankly speaking this is what happens in my mind: the more he/she goes on with the complaints, the more my mind will swirl into the scenario “what if after attending our church for a while and decided to leave. Will they also complain about us to the next church?” Because complaining is a HABIT- a very bad habit indeed. It will make the other party looks so ugly and they hardly realized that by complaining they are making themselves look real ugly.

If you don’t believe me, the next time when someone is complaining about something, look at their faces carefully. You won’t see any smile but frowning, tight face, brows squeezed together and all the veins surfacing which make them look really unappealing.

So the next time, before you complain, look into the mirror and look yourself carefully. If you can train yourself to look really pretty even when complaining, then you can do so. Otherwise, my advice is, don’t get those wrinkles work extra hard on your face.

My suggestion is this: CHOOSE TO GIVE THANKS. Why “choose”? Because to be happy is a choice! We make choices in life that will affect us – and this is one that’s worth making it right.

So take a deep breath and at the count of three, smile to the first person you meet and I’m pretty sure you will receive a smile in return. Have a ‘smiley’ day!!!

In Everything Give Thanks (Part 1)

Picture this: You were struggling to get all your date lines met; your teenage children are trying to stretch your patience; your parents were screaming for attention and protested silently; the church meetings non-stop; events, activities, counseling sessions, important dates etc… and before you knew it, when your mind is full of these do’s and more do’s, you found yourself knocked a motorcyclist and right before your eyes, you saw him flying over to the left side of the vehicle and the motorbike slammed into the opposite direction. Suddenly the mind blank and there were shouting and mourning. The man obviously was groaning in pain and the motorbike was smashed badly.

After some checking, the man insisted that he was okay. He said that he knew me and my husband who is the pastor and that he has come to some of our church major event many times. I was shocked, amazed and then touched by his consideration and concern and instead of me trying to get him to see the doctor, he was trying to comfort me in return. He insisted that he was alright and didn’t need any medical treatment.

Now, can we still give thanks to God? Can we say that this is the will of God? The bible says, “In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus, our Lord.” (I Thess 5:18).

Let’s do a little study on this one sentence:
ἐν παντὶ εὐχαριστεῖτε: τοῦτο γὰρ θέλημα θεοῦ ἐν Χριστῷ Ἰησοῦ εἰς ὑμᾶς.
In all/every (thing), you give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus in you. (concerning/for)

εὐχαριστεῖτε is in Present Active Imperative. Imperative is something that we should take note of and an important matter to the writer. The whole word means, “You all (a plural) give thanks”.

Paul was exhorting the Christian to give thanks in everything (ἐν παντὶ). Sounds pretty simple! He gave the reason why we should give thanks, “for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus in us.” God’s will is embedded in Christ who lives in us too. So we summarize, it simply means, we should give thanks under all circumstances; under all situation, for God is pleased because this is his will already stated in His Son, Christ Jesus who lives in us. (paraphrased)

From this paragraph, indeed it is Paul’s intention to ask the believers to continuously giving thanks to God, willingly and with emphasis that this is the will of God in Christ Jesus. So putting this into the situation earlier, we shall giving thanks for all these happenings. I began to see the logic if we see it on the other side.

In giving thanks, we should first of all be APPRECIATIVE for all those people around us and be thankful for all the happenings. You may say, “How ignorant! Because life isn’t that simple! How could we still give thanks when we go through calamities like losing our loved ones; experiencing injustice, abused, unloved, accused and etc.” Yes, I believe such challenges are part of life.

My question is, “Will you live better by complaining and storming over spilled milk? What do you get if you complain and stomping your feet in anger?” And so what if you actually get even with your enemy, what do you get? Another enemy, that’s all! Or will the situation actually changed when you cry your liver out and will it yield to your wish when you spent sleepless nights staring into the ceiling? Let me guess… answer is “NO”.

But if we choose to be thankful to God for things we do not understand, for all the injustices and accusations or even abusive behavior we received, we may end up learning a precious lesson that will save us from insanity. How many times we heard of sicknesses related to unforgiveness and bitterness. They are like gangrene and before you knew it, had spread deep into your bones.

When we look at situations with a positive attitude and knowing that though bad things happen to us, we still have our God who promised to look after us. He will not leave us nor forsake us. His promises are sure. “God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?” (Num 23:19)

We must learn to trust God that he cares and he knows and when we put our faith in him, we will find solace and peace and joy that the situation cannot give us. So let’s start by giving thanks to the present situation that you are in right now and see God’s peace and joy fill your heart J

(see you at part 2 next week)

Dear Ian

Dear Ian,

I don’t know if writing to you mean anything to you but I guess if talking may not make any sense, maybe writing will.

Growing up is never fun like it used to be but we don’t have a choice. In one hand, we want to grow up fast so that we could have more freedom; on the other hand, there is this small boy within that cries out for attention that you may lose out as an adult. Juggling between the two will definitely cause some struggles in you which results that sometimes you will feel frustrated over things that you want but didn’t get it and things that you don’t want to do but you are required to do.

So son, what is the balance? The best solution is: MAKE WISE DECISIONS ! By this I mean, when you make wise decisions on your own, you don’t have to listen to all those nagging tones from us; when you make wise decisions on your own, you will enjoy doing it more rather than taking orders from the adults.

For example: tidying room – do you feel better doing it yourself without anyone telling you what to do OR you like it when we ask you to clean up the room? Take another example: Does it feel better when you decide to study on your own instead of us nagging you to study all the time? Which of these will make you feel better? To be asked what to do or to decide to do it on your own?

Another example: you know that watching certain shows are not edifying (building up your spiritual life). Though they may seem harmless and a comedy but the content is definitely out. So what should we do? I could say a thousand times, “Don’t watch it!”. You will still do because you are not convinced that you shouldn’t watch it BUT let’s say one day you realized that these show will not bring any profit to you or that music is not suitable and that habits brings no glory to God and you yourself, on your own decided NOT to do any of these, I tell you son, you will feel GOOD inside because you have make a wise decision for God and for yourself.

So that’s why I said, “Don’t wait till someone ask you to do something because it will not bring any meaning in your life. When you have decided on your own, then it will mean something to you.”

So don’t wait to be asked what to do, son. A mature adult (BTW not every adult is mature) must learn how to make wise decision that will bring meaning to his life. I am waiting for the day when you will have that strength to make your own decision that will not only benefit yourself but also to glorify God and also bring gladness in our hearts.

So I will not be with you for a week. But I will remember you in prayer that you will understand what I am talking here. I’m not going to Cambodia because it’s a duty call but because I enjoy doing it. Not only I have made a decision to go but I also rise to the next level, that is: I have actually enjoyed doing it.

Ultimately son, when you continue to make that wise decision, you will realize that it’s no longer a decision; it becomes a way of life (一种生活方式) which will guide you when you face difficult challenges later on.

So son, make good your life… how you want your future to be, start now! Your future starts today! Whatever your decision is today will affect your tomorrow and your future.
Love you so much…

mum

Mega Church Vs Mini Church

I was at a conference helping in interpretation last month. A friend whom I have not seen for awhile came and had a chat with me. We were talking about the conference and then conversation turned to the church that she goes to. I knew that she has been to a new church to help several years ago.

Then she mentioned that recently she has “shifted” to a mega church. Surprised, I asked her why since she has the “burden” to help smaller churches.

She replied, “For my children’s sake. They learned a lot from the church.”

I was taken aback from that answer. Won’t you? What was she implying? Does it mean that all these years, in the smaller or rather mini church, the children learned nothing? What kind of message that she is sending to the children concerning church?

Then she said, “O yes, we have a very good program for parenting.” (She works in a Christian para-organization that deals with Christian courses). At that point, I am sorry to say that I was totally shut off because I don’t think I could trust someone who thought that children could learn more in a mega church is suitable for us. I was raised in a mini church and my children are raised and still are in a mini church and I don’t think they are learning anything less.

I am not against these mega churches. In fact I thank God for their generosity in inviting speakers where otherwise we will never get the chance to hear and offer courses at a reasonable price for those of us who can’t afford overseas trip to hear them. I also appreciate their effort to open all these seminars to benefit people like us from the mini churches.

But why do people have to think that we can learn more from mega churches? I guess the closest that I could think of learning is; we learn different things but not more. Where God has placed us is important. It is not the size of the church that determines our spiritual life. It is never because we came from the mega church and therefore we are more spiritual. If that is so, then where is the place of mini churches? Have the people forgotten that most mega churches gotten their members from other mini churches somewhere?

People like this friend of mine is ignorant of the contribution of mini churches to bring in souls and to disciple them till they are “of age” and then release them to the cities for further studies or work. I salute the work of the pastors from all these churches who are by the way, the majority make up of the percentage of churches here.

Our children need to learn that church is not a place for us just to learn to take and to receive but a place where they can learn to give and to serve. If the church teaches the bible and the people are teachable then we learn much but if there are bible classes, great speakers from half way around the globe but the people are too contented and remained in their comfort zone, then do you think learning is possible?

My recent trip to Cambodia had humbled me greatly. I saw the pastors who earned so little but gave so much of their time into saving souls whereas we saw a few ministries supported by the mega churches and besides giving money have rendered no help nor comfort to them. The pastors from the villages on the other hand have not complaint but humbly serving the community with the little that they have. Their churches are small and tiny (some without water and electricity) and handled by young ladies and young men who serve because they want to see souls saved. Do you think these people learned anything from these pastors?

We from Malaysia, especially in the Klang Valley are really fortunate (or do you call it “blessed”?) because we have so much more. Now we could choose which church to go to. Nowadays people don’t go “church hopping” anymore, I called them “church shopping” because there are so many churches around that allow people to shop from one church to another. This time because the church has a better offer and “on sale”, so we are here. The next month we may go to another because the deals are better there.

Let’s come back to the basics. Let us come back to the meaning of “church going”. Let’s be careful not to fall into the trap of being too selective. God is calling for COMMITMENT from his people; people who are committed enough to be disciples and not just followers. AMEN!

Stressed or desserts...

With the economic crisis and everyone is wondering about what will happen in the next 5 years, it is a wonder that you may be one of those who keep wondering about your tomorrow. Therefore, people are working harder to keep their job. They strive to excel in order to make sure that the monthly bills are paid plus maybe a little extra for the luxury that one has got used to before this.

So, people are hurrying their steps to try to stay in the front and the management are laying down more and more expectations . . . you are stresssss………ed!

This will not only affect your mind (to think straight), body (to remain healthy-remember those gastric and indigestion-how long have you forgot to go to the toilet?), soul and spirit (skipping church and devotions and prayers and cell groups and . . . and . . .)

Recently I came across an article in the Readers’ Digest (March 2008) written by Ron Geraci on “Get a Grip” where he suggested some useful tips to manage some of the stress pertaining to emails, sms, voicemails and so on. I would like to share it here with you, hoping that through these suggestions, you may catch a glimpse of yourself and improve on your situation.

Eight Tips to Fight Info Overload:
1. Spot the signs – Feel alone even as you communicate with people all day? That’s a signal technology is dominating your life.

2. Take baby steps – Try being inaccessible for short spurts to see what happens. The world probably won’t explode.

3. Repeat these four words: “I have a choice.” People who say, “My boss wants me to be reachable after 8 pm” are likely exaggerating the control others have over them.

4. Set Limits – Rein in office email and instant message (sms) traffic. Who truly needs 35 daily FYIs on the outcome of a project?

5. Give clear instructions – Try an email signature that reads, “I answer email at 10am, 1 pm and 4 pm. If you need a quicker response, please call.”

6. Make a task list – If you’re interrupted, you’ll get back to work faster if you have a list of what needs to be done.

7. Stick to a schedule – Handle recreational Web surfing and email at set times. Dipping in and out is classic self-interruption.

8. Do a reality check – After five minutes of unplanned surfing, ask yourself, “Should I really be doing this now?”

As for your spiritual health, switch off all electronic devices when you are alone with Him and enjoy worshipping and praying without having being disturbed. You may feel a bit uncomfortable initially (because you think that you are indispensible), but when you actually set aside time to be with God, you can actually accomplish much more. We trust Him (right?)and we believe that He will be with us all the time (right?) and that whatever happen we shall always depend on Him (right?). So start living it out. I have a prayer that I always pray. This is found in one of the book mark that I received when I was a very young Christian and till today it has been my greatest encouragement. It says, “Nothing is going to happen today that YOU and I cannot handle together.” Have a Pleasant Day!

The Journey to Reconciliation

Relationship is a powerful “conjunction” between human beings. It links us to another person’s life and indirectly gave us the right to be “involved” in the other person’s matter.

Broken relationship will not only take away that right, when it turned ugly, will deny us access to anything pertaining to that person’s life. Usually it involves hurts, pain and agony because of betrayal or breach of trust between the persons. When that hurts deepen due to time and further denial or betrayal, a person will go through hatred. When hatred climax, ironically a person will no longer have any more feelings. Reason: a person cannot hate when there’s no more love. You don’t hate a person on the street that has no relation with you.

So, reconciliation is all about bridging two persons together again in an attempt to heal broken relationship and thus to revitalize a feeling of love for one another again. Now you can understand why this process is so agonizingly torturing to two souls. The good news is: This is exactly what Jesus has done for us on the cross. He died on the cross in acute agony in so that we could be reconciled to God, the Father. Once, we don’t even know nor have any feeling toward this Father in heaven but now, Jesus brought us back to where it all started-we are created to worship Him! Excellent!

That sounds easy. How about healing broken relationship between two souls? This seems a different scenario; the matter was worsened if both are saved, delivered Christians who are ardent believers in reconciliation. Did you see the picture?

Yet, reconciliation is desperately necessary if we want to continue to bear the name “Christian” in our lives. Because being “saved” is being reconciled – either to God or to man! So how could we continuously exist as a Christian and allow hatred to reign in our heart. We often say, “to forgive and to forget.” But in reality, we cannot forget and thanks to our powerful makeup of our brain. Could you actually forget the past when someone actually hurt you deeply? We may talk about it as though it happens to a third party but we know we cannot forget that incident unless we have Alzheimer.

But how do we handle broken relationship? We know we have to because Jesus has done it and He wants us to do likewise. I utterly dislike handling such matters because the hurts that was concealed neatly over years will now have to be faced-once and for all! I know that I have to and I really want to; otherwise it will haunt me to my grave.

I took a long time to pray. If I say that it’s going to be easy, then I am not being truthful. Hurts mean hurts. It takes time to have courage to admit that you need God’s strength to help you to open your hearts in so that you could accept the person who has once hurt you. Good news is: we can do it because the Holy Spirit will grant us strength.

Praying is not enough. Let’s face it! We want to just make right with God but we don’t want to face those whom we thought have hurt us. As long as we say sorry to God, then our job is done. NOT TRUE! The next step, which is crucial, in reconciliation is to face the person. The purpose is not to be what we use to be (the relationship before these happens), rather we are making right what was wrong. Whether the person will accept or not, is not our jurisdiction. We just want to obey God and to do the right thing.

There’s effort – great effort involved. Many times because of pride, we wait for the other party to make the first move. Well, the one who moves first is guilty…konon. But the one who makes the first move is blessed because of humility. This is the hardest first step in our lives. But when you actually take it, it could be the best thing ever happen because it is the KEY to unlock joy and freedom.
Trust me, God will be with you when you learn to stay humble. It is okay to eat that humble pie once in awhile. Making reconciliation is not a time to gauge who’s right or wrong; it is a time to say, “let’s move on!”

Remember: we are trying to do what is right in God’s eyes, not attempting to be what we are not. We remain humble because we love God and God’s people. When we take that first move, it’s not because we are guilty but that we are obedient to God’s Word.

So do not sweep the hurts under the carpet. I have done that many times and it just accumulates until the carpet could no longer contain. And so, a lot of small little humps began to gather and I fell over and tripped. I know it’s time to act: because I love God! So how about you?!

What kind of pastor are you looking for?

I was in the fellowship of pastors and we got to share some views on church and the current trend that we found that is not benefitting the church.

The scenario is:
The members or the leaders (mostly educated and highly qualified in the secular world) somehow began to complain about their pastoral staff/s. Somehow, they manage to find faults and dissatisfaction with the pastor or the pastor’s wife (termed as the most misunderstood personnel in the entire church).

Many pastors are discouraged and wondered if there are any more values in serving God. Their only desire is to serve God and the people whom God has placed under their care. But no matter how much they tried and how hard they worked, they don’t seem to satisfy these people.

Now, let me ask you this question (a question that I am sincerely looking for an answer): What kind of pastor are you looking for? What qualities that you think should make up of the 21st century image of a pastor? I think it would be most helpful if you would participate in this and write your comment and pass it on to your friends who may have a comment in this. Because pastors who come across this blog may benefit from it.

But with one condition, please be constructive. If you have any grievances against your pastors, then you are not being objective. Don’t tell us your church’s name. Just tell us about your opinion. I believe we as pastors may benefit and learn much from you.

And if you do come across a good pastor (in your opinion), share with us too. With such positive remarks, let us cut off Satan’s scheme to destroy the church through negative feelings and actions against the pastors in the churches. You love God, right? You want to see God’s church growing and experiencing revival, right? We want to preach the gospel to the end of the earth, right? This could only possible when the pastors and the members are working together as ONE (UNITY). Satan knew this and he is all out to destroy this mutual trust between us. He is destroying trust between good people in the church and caused so much hurts and pains that were uncalled for. So if you care for us, as much as we care for you, please tell us.